Cat on a hot bin

It’s fine, Tabitha, I’m sure the rubbish can wait.


Where’s Wally?

Or Waldo. Whatever works for you.


What a fantastic pair of knockers

“Right, I’ve done the back. How are you getting on with your knobs?”
“They’re knobs.”
“I’m just going by the instructions. it says to affix the handles to the drawers using the bolts.”
“They’re not handles, and those aren’t bolts. They’re screws.”
“Fine, but the instructions say handles and bolts.”
“OK. well, anyway. Are you getting on all right?”
“It’s a bit tricky because you have to hold with one hand and then push the bolt through with the other, while keeping it steady.”
“D’you want me to hold your knob for you while you start screwing?”
“And you wonder why they changed it.”


If there’s a bigger bite it can’t be found

Yeah, Wagon Wheels have definitely got smaller.


Unattended Table

It’s Thomas’s own fault for abandoning his Happy Meal.


The donkey in the pit

Stick with this.


My heart belongs to Daddy

I’m not sure I like the sound of that.


If there’s a bustle in your hedgerow, don’t be alarmed now

Oh, hello.


(Tabitha was sniffing its backisde a few minutes ago. She’s now looking a bit pained.)

Cat on a hot tin windscreen

You know, you’re making it really hard for me to leave for work.


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